Random Thought Friday...

Well I'm still not in the mood for blogging but it's sorta therapeutic so I shall press on. Besides the masses have demanded that I return and what kind of King would I be to ignore my Loyal Subjects?! On to that murky mess in my brain that has come to be known as Random Thoughts....

DISCLAIMER: this will most likely be relatively incoherent and may end without a point. You have been warned.

I don't feel there's a question that could be asked that I couldn't respond to with the phrase: "Applesauce, bitch."

"King, what are you doing for lunch?"

Applesauce, bitch.

I only use curse words when I write. Is that odd?

Yesterday Your President GWB used the word "concernation". That's not meant to be funny. In fact it's just plain sad and I am actually "concernated" about him! HA!!

I like it when people fall down.

When I get angry with someone I sometimes tell that person, "I wish you would just fall down and skin your knee."

(I hope someone has the quick wit to review this post and respond with, "After reading your post I hope you skin your knee." To see a response like or similar to this would be a real shocker.)

I caught myself singing along to a Kelly Clarkson song this morning in the car. I laughed at myself and tried to turn the radio when I realized it was a cd. I BOUGHT KELLY FREAKIN CLARKSON'S CD?! Hell just froze over my friends.

My sister just emailed me and said "Hey RANDOM THOUGHT FRIDAY!!!" I think that's the first compliment I've ever received from her. If you're reading this you're still a JERK maam!!!!

I have decided to write and release the Harry Potter 7 before JK Rowlings does. I am quite sure I will make millions just because people are so gullible and paranoid. I can hear the conversation now... "They say JK didn't write it but I think she did. It's a trick, a ploy even. I'm going to buy it anyway just to find out."

I have decided that if and when I die I want a bunch of Arab women going wild, wailing, pulling their hair and shouting my name to the heavens while their husbands shoot ak-47's into the air. I'm telling you people will be talking about that for years!

I want to get myself an edible hat - that way I can make a lot more outrageous claims.

I've worked out how to piss people off. For some reason when someone says something positive to me, even though I agree, I shake my head. When they say something negative I nod. Anyone know why this pisses people off? Am I psychological genius?

For someone who has a dreadful singing voice, the worse thing in the world is when I'm driving along and the CD in the car skips, throwing what should be silence, but is actually filled with my last non-note fluttering away to awkward silence.

A new guy started here this week and he says his name is Niko Kane. C'mon dude how much did you have to pay to get your name changed?! I always address him as follows...Hello Niko Kane...if that's your reeeaaal name. I think he's afraid of me. HA!

If someone killed my dad with a 9mm gun I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't walk around with a chain on my neck with a gold 9mm charm to remember him by and yet people who believe Jesus died on a cross do essentially the exact same thing.

I think Beyonce tastes like Butterscotch. I totally stole that from Grant's blog!

Niko Kane...if that's his reeeeaaal name....dresses just like Kanye West. I will eventually have to lure him to a bar and beat him like he owes me money and then blame it on the liquor. Poor Niko Kane.

If I ever have a son I will name him Bruce. And if I ever have a daughter I will get her a sex change before she starts school because I think the children will make fun of a girl named Bruce.

In Living Color reruns, Making the Band, The Ultimate Hustler and Run's House. Do I have to say anything else?

Ok I guess I should do some work now. Thanks for stopping by and thanks for your comments this week. Everybody have a good weekend and remember Monday is only 2 days away!!