Riggedy Random Thizzought Friday...

Throw your hands in the air! Now wave them like you just don't care!

Everybody in your office looking at you like you're nuts? Good.

Tell them bitches it's Random Thought Friday and if they keep staring, you'll get your internet King to come slap the snot out of them. That's right baby I got a strong pimp hand and I'm just dying to use it.

It's me, The King of All Bloggers, back once again to share with you folks my completely random thoughts that will either confuse the crap out of you or make you point at your screen and laugh until the tears roll down your chubby little cheeks. Either way I'm happy, you're happy, and your employer, well fuck them. It's me the guy who's thoughts are ridiculous. The guy that could make Sadaam turn Catholic. The reason the Amish have started buying computers. And for all you bloggers hating on me, you can't shut me up. Dot dot dash, that's right I'll destroy that ass in morse code if I have to. Now for my legion of fans....... It's FRIIIIIDAAAAYYY!!!! Let's get it.

I do not want you people to start thinking that I'm a nice guy alright? I'm not. I'm irritable, sarcastic, and an all around jerk. Satan the Devil sleeps with his lights on because of me ok? The Boogey Man is hiding in your closet because he knows I'm looking for him. We clear?! Good.

If you've been working here for more than 15 years stop complaining to me about how much you hate your job and how you're looking for a new one. I don't believe you. Besides they don't hire people your age unless you plan on greeting customers entering Wal- Mart.




If you take the time to fix your hair and put a nice dress or skirt on then do not put on a pair of sneakers. I hate that and if I see it I'm gonna trip you. You've been warned.

I know, I know, I'm mean and I'm a jackass, and blah blah blah and yet here I am, not caring.

You're a dude, I'm a dude. If you ask me one more time did I miss you I'm going to take that as an open invitation to whoop your ass. Thanks.

Somebody has far too much time on their hands to come up with this.

I have received the video of the woman punching the other woman in the face. It was funny. So please nobody else has to send it to me!

Are these RTs sounding angry? LOL!

I'm in a great mood actually.

Anybody wanna sponsor my trip to go see Mission Impossible 3? I'll also need cash for a large popcorn, some nachos, and a box of buncha crunch. You can all chip in so it won't be a burden on one person. I don't care how you do it just tell me what time to go pick up the money from Western Union. Thanks in advance.

If you're wondering what's up with this week's featured blogger I owed someone a favor. Won't happen again.

Everybody email Nikki and tell her that The King says STOP PUSSYFOOTING AROUND!!! HA!

I was telling someone about my blog the other day and as I was talking I heard myself say "Yeah I'm kind of a big deal" and I thought to myself "ok this has gone too far". HA!

Ok so that was kind of a thought within a thought. Right?

The only reason chicks with big butts don't have men is either by choice or.....well it's by choice. Bad breath can be fixed. Those craters in your face can be fixed. Lazy, bad attitude? So what. You just don't lose that butt and we're good.

Hey you! Who me? Yeah you! Get into my car! We needed Amber Alerts back when Billy Ocean was on the scene! Where is Billy these days?

Don't ask me to comment on your blogs anymore. I will have someone else comment for me. Why? Because I'm special like that. If you would like to be my spokesman or spokeswoman just let me know!

16 days to go bitches and I'm done. Somebody find me a code for a countdown clock to put on my blog.

Ok I'm done. I got surfing to do. So go on get out of my life twice! Then come back just so I can tell you to get out again!!!

Have a great weekend friends and don't take your little bad ass chaps to see M.I. 3 until you pump some money into Akeelah and the Bee. Tell all your friends to go as well!!! The King has spoken!