Before we get started you've got to remember NOT to compare your man or any future boyfriends to The King. I am an anomaly, a singularity. It would be like comparing a five year old learning to shoot hoops to the great Michael Jordan. It just wouldn't make sense. Let's get started with some things you ladies should be looking for.

2. Focus: A real man knows the difference between what's important and what's not. A real man doesn't waste time on nonsense that don't bring him a profit. Sure they can have a hobby--I blog-- but it must serve some sort of purpose. The purpose of my hobby is to keep me from quitting my job because of boredom and being broke and sleeping in my car. A real man is focused on power, money, and family. HE DOES NOT FOCUS ON SEX! Sex is a by product of having power and money. Have you seen Donald Trump's wife?! Yeah he got her because he's soooo charming. If you believe that I've got some beach land to sell you in Kansas.

4. Doesn't Gossip: A real man keeps his mouth shut. He shelters his words and rations information. A man that engages in gossip with you will also tell his boys how freaky you are and if you ever piss one of them off they'll quickly tell anybody who'll listen how much you enjoy having sperm drip from your chin or whatever kinky stuff you're into.
5. Word is his bond: A real man doesn't make promises he can't keep. He'd rather die than break a promise especially to his family and most notably his woman. He knows that his words

6. Role Model: A real man respects himself and others at all times unless, of course, he has been disrespected. He serves as an example to his disciples and especially his children. He sets the tone for his children and keeps them from discovering he has weaknesses.
7. Looks like a man: A real mand doesn't look like a woman. He doesn't have piercings, or long hair, or shave his chest. Manicures are allowed.
Ok my boss just asked me for some stuff I was supposed to do 2 weeks ago. Gotta roll. I hope you ladies have learned something and if your man falls short in one or two categories recognize that a real woman works with her man to help him become an even better man.
92 comments:
#4 hits home...i hate when gossip...i really hated when people gossip...but when a man do it, it is ten times worst
wtf? i'm the first?
okay, let me respond to your declarations...
1.a real man admits when he's sick. sniffles are one thing, but don't go trying to be all 'manly' when it comes to neglecting your health for the sake of trying to be a 'real man'. that's just stupid.
and a real man will cry when he feels the need to cry because he's confident enough to emote like that. a real sista will understand this.
a real man will admit to weaknesses because that's just how shit goes. nobody's superhuman. we have our limitations and a grown person will know them. doesn't mean he has to succumb to them, but it's unrealistic to assume a brotha is strong all the time. that's what a strong sista by his side is for.
2. a real man focuses on family, money, and power, but knows the importance of intimacy, too.
3. i'm with you on this one.
4. this one too. i think folk who gossip have nothing else to talk about.
5. TRUE. even if a brotha don't come through with the promise, at least let me know you put forth as much effort as you could to come through.
6. a real man is a role model, but i think that means he's a role model of a human being, which means sometimes the kids will see his weaknesses. i think kids should see that cuz parents are still human and i think kids get a better understanding of human nature when they reach adulthood if they see a realistic portrayal of human behavior at a young age. now this ain't to say the parent should be weak to the point of not trying to fight despite that weakness. if a brotha has a drug problem, he needs to battle that shit until he overcomes it. so long as the love for the child and treatment of the child isn't affected adversely, it's all good to me.
7. a real man is confident in his look, regardless of piercings or long hair or whatever. it comes down to this...superficial shit like looks don't determine what makes a 'real' man and frankly, all of the intangible things you list is what makes for a 'real' woman, too. therefore, it's not about being a 'real' man...it's about being a 'grown' person.
i should have known i wasn't the first. LOL
I've got all those qualities, plus I'm creative and funny and unbalanced and filled with rage and totally evil. That must be why I'm alone - I'm too good for any woman. Yeah, I like your thinking. Thanks, King. Time to go home now and make love to myself.
As usual.
LONG HAIR
A real man does not have long hair man what is this. That is so silly a lot of men who don't have ling hair are jealous of men who do.
I have long hair I ware it in a pony tail, braids, or just let it hang sometimes. This is silly even in the medieval times when whites conquered the world many of these white men had long hair. And what about when blacks had afros in the late 1960s and 1970s and look at what they accomplished politically. King Long hair is irrelevant to manhood and you have many men these days with long hair.
Men who are bald would love to borrow some hair from a man who has long hair.
My hair is longer than some women’s. So what it is just hair?
Chance
bout damn time king, i've been clicking over here all damn day, lol
not all men who are bald want to have hair. uh, many of them are bald by choice.
shame on you for trying to make it seem like people covet what you got just cuz you have it and they don't. if you're gonna pose an argument against what king said, the least you could do is argue a good point, not diss his point in order to make your point seem more valid.
that's bullshit.
total bullshit.
yep it's confirmed -- I'm a real man
BTW -- the 'total bullshit' line was a follow up to what Nikki said.
I'm in agreement.
#1, I do want my man to know when it is time to go to the doctor. Too many brothas are dying because they won't go get a daggone checkup.
#5 - I used to be married to a man who would tell me anything he thought I wanted to hear. I hate that shit. If we can't afford to take a vacation -- say that! Don't say "sure baby" and then disappoint me after I'm packed.
#7 - I love a man that looks, smells, walks and talks like a REAL MAN. I like facial hair, don't wear braids or ponytails or piercings. I want to know that I am with a man who won't spend more time in the mirror than me.
Rell - was there ever any doubt?
To NIKKI,
I have had many short almost bald hair cuts. I have had afro type styles also, I have had fades, flat tops, etc.
Bout damn time!!!!!!
chele - i do like a guy who spends less time in the mirror than i do. then again, i don't spend that much time, so if he spends less time that means he's spending NO time in front of the mirror. LOL
Nikki & Chele I see your point about going to the doctor. Getting a regular check up is definitely manl because by staying healthy you are looking out for your family.
Healthy, well, maintained, and groomed dreads get a pass.
LEt the church say AMen to #4..do you know how many gossippin men I know......
the best - meanwhile, that's not what you were saying in your previous post.
this is what you said:
Men who are bald would love to borrow some hair from a man who has long hair.
you saying you have had short hair in the past has absolutely no bearing on this argument cuz you're talking about bald men.
meanwhile, if you saying you've done the bald thing before, that means admitting you wanted the hair that someone else had (based on your assumption, that is), which can't be true cuz you chose to cut your hair off and go bald.
I agree with you D.
1. I love a man who doesn't complain too much, that's my job. But like Chele said he does need to know when it's time to go to the doctor.
2. So glad you said this one. I need to email this to my ex. He's 35 and still has dreams of being America's Next Top Rapper and pit bull kennel owner. So sad!
3. I hear you loud and clear!
4. Gossip...nuff said.
5. That is so important to be reliable and consistent.
6. I think that if he has weaknesses then he shouldn't be afraid to let them be known. He should figure out a way to compensate and let them see that he has coping/problem solving skills.
7. I don't like girly men.
Good post.
i must add one, but that's off of my preferences he has to have a sense of spirituality at the least...of course i am not sayin he has to go to church (u will never hear me say that) but he needs to have a relationship with God
Thanks Laa.
Kween you are right. A real man has a relationship with God. That relationship will help him with numbers 2,3,4,5,& 6.
A real man has ambition......
To NIKKI,
NiKKI said the the best said: Men who are bald would love to borrow some hair from a man who has long hair.
I forgot to add LOL behind that satement. HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Now it makes sense
Men who are bald would love to borrow some hair from a man who has long hair. LoL.
We cleared that up.
A real man doesn't feel inferior
i've seen some ungroomed locs on a brotha who was about as a 'real' a man as it gets.
i still don't think hair has anything to do with it. some guys are big with keeping up their looks and some aren't. i don't see how that affects his manhood, though. maybe it's just not a priority with the brotha.
LOL @ America's Next Top Rapper and pit bull kennel owner.
Hair is nothing manhood is all that counts.
that's a great idea! why hasn't anyone thought of an 'america's next top rapper'???
He might be real Nikki but walking around looking dusty is not the way to go. A certain amount of grooming for a grown ass man is necessary.
if he's a construction worker busting his ass in the hot sun in a dirt pit, i'm gonna give him a pass on that one, d.
To Nikki,
I am a darkskinned black man, and do you feel that it ok for me to have long. Or do you feel that short hair would probaly fit me.
Or it real does not matter it just depends on how it makes the guy look.
Nikki, please don't get started on that ANTR...too many brothers out here think they can make a living off of it and don't try to do anyting else.
nice.... how about sincere and honest! honesty kinda goes w/ "word is bond" but you need to be more specific.. dudes lie! you dont want someone that lies to you, even if it is small!
I just prefer a man with short (or no) hair.
I'm going to marry Richard T. Jones in my next life.
LOL@laa
on the one hand, i think brothas should have the freedom to pursue their dreams. on the other hand, if i was the girlfriend of the guy 'pursuing his rap dream' i'd probably be kicking someone's ass for creating 'america's next top rapper'
HAHAHA
I'm with you Chele...give me a bald man or one with short waves anyday!!
@chele - i dig a cat with short hair cuz i love rubbing a brotha's head. a fetish of mind is to massage a brotha's scalp. i do that shit without even thinking.
it's much harder to do if he's got alot of hair, although i also dig the idea of me and my loc'ed man doing each other's hair.
now THAT'S a fantasy worth having...
I can't support a brotha's dreams. I will, however, support his GOALS.
There's a difference.
A real man doesnt still live @ home in his 30's wiht his mother or depends on his "GIRL" to support them and sits on his ass and plays Playstaion all day
the only time I rub my man's head is when I'm looking down at him while he's ... well ... you know.
To Chele,
chele said: I'm going to marry Richard T. Jones in my next life.
You might be a man in your next life and Richard might reincarnate as a man too.
In reincarnation it works that way sometimes.
Also men with short hair look better I agree to some degree.
i used to be unfatuated w/ conrnrolls (which is why i love AI) but a nice low-cut is sexy (especially if they keep it shaped up!)
If I did come back as a man I wouldn't be gay, so step off G.B.
A man must not feel defeated in life and there many men who feel defeated. GUYS stop it!
So Chance do you think real men go back on their word?
To Chele,
Chele said: If I did come back as a man I wouldn't be gay, so step off G.B.
What racial group would you reincarnate into? And Gay men have a lot of power some of the workers at google blogger that you are on for free are GAY.
But you depend upon them for this free service.
Answer these ?
To Laa,
Laa said: So Chance do you think real men go back on their word?
Chance: Laa, Men lie to cover up shame, we don’t won’t you females to be angry with us we often lie. So you won’t become angry with us and we a deep shame when we lie to you females. Because we always feel that you ladies will leave us if we tell the truth. A man who is not in love with a woman does not care if she knows the truth or not. But a man who has developed some feelings for his woman cares whether or not she will leave if she ever found out the truth about something. Also it depends upon the situation in a man will lie depending upon the situation if it is something that he knows will cause his lady (female) to resent and get angry with him and his lying could hurt the relationship. He will lie.
I will explain in the next comment more.
chele, that's an important distinction to make...the ones between dreams and goals. never even thought about that until you said it.
i LOVE moments like this when i get some more insight.
now i can officially say i won't hamper a brother dreaming but i support his goals. :)
GB: Why does it always come back to race with you?
This post is about real men ... it's okay that you can't relate, however it is a waste of time to continue to comment on a topic that you don't understand. It highlights your ignorance. Even though we all find this extremely amusing it also gets tiresome.
thanks nikki.
one important rule: a man should not be afraid to show his affection....or profess his love...dont tell me you love me when we're alone, but when you're around your boys you clam up...thats a bitch move....real men fall in love and can admit it to whom ever
Chance said...
To LAA,
LAA said:Chance is a masochist that's the only reason I can see for someone to come where they aren't wanted. To hurl insults at him just gets him off. How sick!
Chance: I you judging me based upon how you would feel in my situation. But Laa I can take it if I really believed that people here hated me LAA. I would leave I really would seriously.
Koolbreeze said…
I hate you chance
Ddot the King said…
I hate you GB. I really do. Seriously. Now roll!!!
Chele said…
Seriously GB I really hate you.
Kween khameleon said…
And oh yeah I HATE U TOO
Koolbreeze said…
No its not a fun…we really do hate you
You are still here and haven't left. Isn't that going back on your word?
N1S: I know that's right! I want a man to be able to shout his love for me from the rooftop.
To Laa,
Chance: If a man feels he can not make his woman happy and she is always on his back. Needlessly arguring, verbally abusing him, challenging his manhood with negative comments about how he did not do this or that, trying to hurt his feelings, etc. The man will leave that woman because he feels she is not happy with him.
Laa, one of the greatest things for us men is to make the woman in our lives happy and to protect her. This making her happy makes us men feel powerful and strong and it motivates us. To go out into the world like Goethe’s Faust and accomplish anything from a job or idea etc.
Men we want you females to be happy with us, we want to make you happy and complementing your man makes him happy and it inspires him.
More in the next comment!
for some reason im starting to get all moist in the pants when i see a man in dreads (well well kept ones)
and i love a man in a suit. its so sexy
To Laa,
Women lie more than men LIE and this is true.
This also motivates men to lie.
no1...i can't get moist in the pants EVERY time i see a brotha with locs cuz i've got alot of those brothas in my fam. LOL
but i will do a double-take automatically if a brotha has locs. i want to see how groomed they are. they also give me a clue to his physical and mental health.
i don't see as many guys in the atl with locs. new york is the mecca for that kind of brotha.
To Laa,
I am strong I have to be as you can see also, I don't let others influence my behavior. Notice how I remein independent like a man and many of you have to side up with each other. I don't like being forced to side up LIKE the average white man not all white men but the majority. They (white men) prefer to remain independent in thoughts, opinions, ideas, and let the crowd determine their future.
This is omething that blacks, both black men and black women need to learn from whites.
I am independent I don't need to side with KINg or anyone else as you can see I am strong. Men who are independent are truly KINGs. And this blog does not have one owned by a true king.
HOW is that for an eye opner.
PSA: typing "this is true", does not make it true...unless you got stats...just say IMO, instead of tryna pass it off as fact
nikki....lol, yeah please dont get moist @ the cite of fam...thats another topic all together, lol
I'm back!
Yes a man should own at the very least 3 suits.
LOL@ N1S with the "this is true" stuff!
Chance,
You wrote,"...if I really believed that people here hated me LAA. I would leave I really would seriously."
You are still here and numerous people told you. That is going back on your word, essentially lying!
it really irritates me when ppl do that...cause its just usually their experience or their opion...
besides it looks like you're tryna convince yourself..if it is true...is it necessary to say so
@laa - he doesn't believe you folk. i think that's the loophole. LOL
To Laa,
Laa said: You wrote,"...if I really believed that people here hated me LAA. I would leave I really would seriously."
You are still here and numerous people told you. That is going back on your word, essentially lying!
Chance: The key word is believed, and I don't.
You see Laa, un-like most people I am not so easily fooled. And like you know laa, people lie so much. To the point that they can’t be trusted and believed to the point of when they say I hate you. And wanting the hearer to believe them. Can’t even be trusted to authentically hate wow!
To Nikki and Laa,
Nikki said: @laa - he doesn't believe you folk. i think that's the loophole. LOL
Chance: BINGO! And even if they did it would not matter because I am Me.
So LAA was right. You are a liar and thus, not a real man.
alrighty then...before this thread is hijacked by more ridiculousness...
whomever said a 'real' man don't lie is on point with that shit. in fact, i'll take it a step further.
'real' folk let it be known how they really feel. ain't no beating around the bush, ain't no being afraid of the ensuing conflict, ain't no refusing to tell cuz he's trying to be more 'mysterious'.
just tell it damnit. i might get mad but i'll get over that shit.
To Chele,
Chele said: So LAA was right. You are a liar and thus, not a real man.
Chance: It does not matter what I think it is your mind and othe rpeople have their minds and what you all think is all that matters.
Never care what I think if you don't won't to all that matters is your opinion not mine. And I respect that and am at peace with that.
Imitate me by being independent like the average white man be independent.
I agree Nik. Real men don't lie or withold vital information. A little mystery never hurt anybody but not on important topics.
D -- someone should have told my 1st husband that ... he was real mysterious about the fact that he had a wife when he said "I do" to me.
LMAO!!!
LOL. It's funny now but that shit wasn't funny when it happend 16 years ago!
i bet it wasn't! i woulda wanted to kill his ass!
damn@chele.
DAMN.
Yeah. Apparently, he 'forgot' to get divorced or 'thought' he was divorced ... i don't know ... some crazy shit he was trying to tell me. I know all about liars.
that's the "deal breaker", right chele? :o)
TTD -- you know that's right! I was outta there after that mess went down. Deal breaker #1!
Chance~ hate is a strong word and most likely not thrown around losely...if someone who doesn't know you says they hate you because you are more irratating than a nat...then by golly i think we hate you. matter of fact i know we do.
damn shele!!! that is some shitty shit!
To Chele,
Your ex-husband committed bigamy.
Bigamy
("bi-") two
("-gamy") marriages.
Bigamy is the actual legal term used in law. The legal "offense" of bigamy is defined as being when a person has obtained "legally recognized" marriages to more than one living mate at the same time.
Sad that you had to go through that.
Many women are not honest themselves they in general are like the men in their racial group. If men in a racial groups tell a lot of lies, any observer will be able se that many of the women in that same racil group tell lies also. Which then motivates the men to lie even more to cover their tracks.
It is a two way street.
chance...for real though...
recognize when folk know what's meant by the term even if it's not used correctly. you have a way of straight up jacking a thread the fuck up. PLEASE check that.
everyone knew what chele meant, including chele.
there is absolutely, positlvely, no need whatsoever for you to feel as though you have to prove to us you know what the word means.
To Nikki,
I know Nikki but there possibly will be people coming to the blog and do not know what the legal term for this behavior is.
They understand what Chele described but do not know the legal term for it.
I sorry if I gave an intelligent term do describe the situation just apreciate the knowledge nothing more. If you knew KOOl! But someone else my not and I bet many did not and some will lie and say they did.
I sorry for acting WHITE (INTELLIGENT - I thougt I wass dark but I am MIXED so the white intelligence comes to the surface sometimes sorry!)
Chance
let me put this in terms you understand, seeing as you're of 'white folk intelligence' and then i'm done with this discourse with you.
it is the epitome of an insult to this nigger here when you, with a patronizing note to your response, make the assumption that
a. race has anything to do with a person's level of intelligence.
b. think i'm that nigger who thinks a person is 'acting white' when he uses a term longer than one syllable long.
this ain't about flaunting a vaulted knowledge of the english language. it ain't about checking folk with the hopes they recognize the brain you have in your head is used for more than just taking up space. this ain't about you 'educating' people about their 'ignant' views.
all this shit is about, all it's ever been about is hanging with folk and talking shit and occasionally engaging in thought-provoking discourse. every now and again it gets serious, and when it does, the intelligent folk here recognize the change and adjust accordingly.
i think this is the one thing you have a challenge in grasping. for some reason you actually believe by being here you're 'educating us dumb niggers' with your bullshit about race and whatever the fuck you talk about.
meanwhile, your presence on this blog has been little more than a disruption, little less than a distraction, rarely, if ever, enlightening, and mostly annoying.
you think that by 'doing you' you're making a statement by remaining here despite the fact that you hardly ever make sense to the folk who make the mistake of trying to read your responses to shit. you think you're making this big stand against whatever the fuck you think you're making a big stand against when you remain here despite the fact that people laugh both in your face and behind your fucking back and dismiss your comments as words coming from someone who doesn't make a bit of sense.
believe me when i tell you, you're wasting your time here. the only thing you show by remaining at this blog is that you're a glutton for punishment. there is absolutely nothing you can do to persuade the people here to adopt your beliefs.
there is absolutely nothing you can do to make folk here dig you as a person, because when it's all said and done, you think it's more important to establish your 'obvious intellectual superiority' than it is for you to just fucking chill and relate and engage.
if you want to engage in mental masturbation, this ain't the forum for it. you've seen plenty of threads here to recognize this fact. WAKE THE FUCK UP. stop being that dog that folk kick in the street cuz the dog's too fucking stupid to get out of the fucking way.
if you were truly as smart as your 'white intelligence' leads you to believe, you'd do the smart thing and stop wasting your time and energy in a spot where folk don't get you and don't want to.
now i'm sure you're gonna feel compelled to respond to what i just told you cuz i've obviously insulted you and you've gotta put this nigger in her place. know ahead of time whatever you say at this point will be ignored, so again you will find yourself engaging in the fruitless task of typing a long, drawn out, incoherent response to someone who don't give a shit.
To Nikki,
Chance: telling a person not to respond is a copout knowing that the person will naturally respond so save the cop-out.
Nikki you call yourself a NIGGER, WOW! Then you get upset when I speak of me acting white because so people seem to get up set when I display intelligence (acting white). But you have no problem calling yourself a higher with the er at the end of the word nigger wow! You could at least call yourself a nigga with the a at the end Hummmmm! So where did blacks get the word nigger?
They got it from whites who used it to degrade and humiliate blacks WOW! So I guess you as black woman and whites agree on something. So why are you angry at me for using my intelligence (acting white according to blacks).
SO WHAT UP MY NIGGER?
You talk bad about whites well using NIGGER to describe yourself tell me they have a lot of control over you. So why are you angry at me for being intelligent (acting white, at least I am mixed). So what UP?
Nikki, you know that many black blog enjoy negativity and creating more negativity that many come to black blogs. Because blacks like pretending to have been offended because they enjoy rudeness, anger, and negativity like you. You just don’t to admit it, many of us blacks enjoy negativity.
So I will say this you are not a victim by me so save it.
This is all about the enjoyment of negativity, anger, rudeness, etc which many of blacks like and yes Nikki this is the black blogsite for this stereotypical behavior. HEY WE BLACK.
You are not offended you are just pretending like a lot of us black do.
Sorry for acting intelligent (acting white).
Nikki you even called me intelligent a awhile back and you even commented on my intelligence and had me on you blogroll because of my intelligence. And I did not ask you to put me their and you did.
Stop pretending to be offended I know we are blacks we all get enjoyment out of negativity that why we pursue it. Yes, many do but not all of us are fully black, so we have right to act like those racial groups we are mixed.
And, you just encountered that side of me. There are other hood blogs to go visit if this is too deep for you. ACT intelligent sometime YEAH! I know what you are thinking you mean act intelligent like a white man or white woman?
Not all of them are intelligent just some are.
PEACE ON THAT!
To Nikki,
Nikki said: i think this is the one thing you have a challenge in grasping. for some reason you actually believe by being here you're 'educating us dumb niggers' with your bullshit about race and whatever the fuck you talk about.
Chance: You call black dumb ass niggers, well you and certain whites and certain memeber of othe colored racial groups agree on something so what is the problem?
Nikki said: Chance you are a glutton for punishment, yes I am and people who can take a lot of punishment are reason why you have civil rights and voting rights right now, we are the reason why you still are not in slavery. All of these great black people and white people who helped helpless like you out. We all had onething in common the ability to take a lot of punishment, pain and suffering.
Think about that, you would prefer to live in America with men like me (able to take a lot of punishment, which is a sign of masclinity by the way) who will keep you safe from suffering as much as possible. Than to go live in Africa with other blacks.
So who cares if you are born in AMerica, many are born some where else and come to live here.
Why don't some people just leave America.
I love this America, it is the BEST ABOVE THE REST. And if certain blacks don't like ARICA CALLs.
SO who it NIKKI me and my America or Skaka ZULU and Africa?
I know me and my America because we the best. Someday Africa will become a great continent like she was during the time of ancient Egypt.
YEAH I SAID BIG TIME
First of all, let me say that you're doing your thing over here. My Kingdom is blowing up.
Now for the real men. You're funny, D. Why do guys front like they're too strong to cry? Real men do cry, but not over something silly like because I'm being mean to him...that's just being a big baby.
#7--too funny!
strength, focus, love's his family, role model...that's what i'm talking about. I see you.
Good stuff, D!
To Nikki,
I forgot, I did an essay Titled Nigga and Nigger (the orgins) at my blog a few days ago. Since are always calling your darksin self a niiger with the er at the end. I figure you could at least learn the origins of the word nigger at my blog. This is an intellectual essay so bring your brain.
Nikki~ that was very well put. Gay boy was just too dumb to get what you were saying...sorry you wasted that intelligence on such a stupid person.
OK.. I'm laughing my ass off.. *high five Nikki* very eloquently put..
aight.. and D.. good post.. man u becoming sexier by the keystroke.. LOL
You know, I agree with most of what you wrote King, with a fe minor adjustments of the feminine nature...
However I'd have to say that for women a REAL man is like art. Even when we don't know much about them, we know when one, and we know what we like.
http://www.worthwatering.blogspot.com/
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